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20 January 2006 @ 09:09 pm
Why, why we gotta die?  
You know. I always go to bed, looking forward to waking up. Then when I do wake. I realize that the me from last night was a fucking idiot. And that I sghou;d have never of gone to sleep.

But waking up is the hardest part of fucking day. But thats not saying much. Since my day is pretty relaxed and laid back. Too bad my mind doesn't follow the days lead.

Ooh no. My paranoia just has to go into overdrive while i'm try to relax. Because for god sakes it's /holiday/s and i'm supposed to relax in a holidays.

But noo. I have to go into overkill mode and worry about everything. Like when I thought I had ear cancer or something. All i had was a small bump behind my ear. But noo. I couldn't go to sleep untill I looked up every single sympton of cancer. Every type of cancer and then double checked and then rung up Zara at 4 AM in the morning on her cell and asked her about it.

She hung up. But then again, I hand up on her all the time.
Ugh like right now i'm worrying about how my hair will look completely blonde and if i'll be late for class on the first day of school, and if i'll be the odd one out on a buss. Since i;ve never been on a bus to go to school before so yea. And i'm sure that Renata and Zara have been bitching about behind my back and that Anna is really back stabbing me.

Maybe i'm a tiny bit nurotic. And i'm /sure/ I have many many other personailty deficiencies. Oh god. I need some coke.
What kind of madness?: crazyNurotic
The Flowers' Sing: Good Life [ Scrubs Soundtrack ]